The knitting book I borrowed from the library is due back soon, so I'm going tomorrow to return it. I might take out another book if I can find one that looks promising.
There was a quilting book I was going to check out, more for my mom than myself, but today hasn't been a very good day for anything really. Been feeling rather numb, and if not numb, then upset and sick. I tried to work on quilting and knitting, but neither one has really grabbed my interesting beyond a few stitches or rows. Some shit has happened in the past couple days, and really, all I'm noticing is that I'm not good enough, or I didn't make good enough decisions in the past for where I am now. Really it just comes back to not feeling good enough. And well, really, that is the story of my life.
I don't know what kind of book to check out of the library - and the online catalogue is (once again) unavailable. Tempted to read some books from movies I've watched recently, also tempted to read some Shakespeare. But really, I don't know what any of them are actually about. And I don't know what kind of thing I want to read. Happy? Sad? Comedy? Self help? I think a crafty type book will have to wait since I couldn't get into it today. Maybe I won't take out any new books yet.
I'm kind of leaning towards Shakespeare. I do want to read more of that. I was hoping to go to the Stratford Theatre for my birthday, but that isn't going to happen by the looks of things. I'm starting to think I'll just spend that day in bed and avoid the world. Or maybe watch the entirety of Slings & Arrows. Again. For the umpteenth time. Maybe I'll borrow The Odyssey by Homer. Not that I know what it's about, but they read some of it in that movie, The Reader (good movie, I recommend it.)
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As for not feeling good enough - Is this better than making the choice to go to university without knowing what you're going to do, waste $24 000 on tuition and then come out after fourth year STILL without knowing what you're doing? I know a lot of people like that. The point is, we all make our choices, some of them good and others maybe not-so-good. And I'm sure that many of your choices were good too, even if they are different from what society considers as "good."
ReplyDeleteThat's kind of where I am now (minus the 24,000 in debt.) Dunno what I want to do, not a hell of a lot appeals to me really. But yeah - I looked into the psychology program at UWO. They only have ONE prereq from high school. Just one. And do I have it? No. Because it's MATH. Bah fucking humbug. lol.
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